Category Archives: Parenthood

Single moms

Single moms need a lot of help. At times its so difficult to balance it all. Trying to raise kids in the ways of the Lord pays off. I have many things that go on in my life throughout the day & I’m super busy.
God must give us single mothers extra grace to do all we have to do. If there is no father in the picture it may seem extra trying at times. Find time to spend with God and refresh yourself.
I am determined to hold my ground no matter what comes my way… The teen years, raising sons, my child’s health issues, money issues whatever it is I hold on to God.
These are real things single parents go through.
Speak up if you need help, take a break, get together with friends, exercise, read the bible. There are many ways to relieve the stress in your lives.
Just know there are a lot of us in the same situation.You are not alone
Isaiah 54:5
For your Creator will be your husband; the LORD of Heaven’s Armies is his name! He is your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, the God of all the earth.

Women and Children in abusive homes

I  have thought long and hard about these things and I’ve lived through a lot of this myself. Yes God thinks family is important .

Everyone who knows me knows what kind of wife I was and what kind of mom I am to my kids.

I value marriage and all God thinks of it.

But at what point does a person step away and say “Enough” I’m not talking about getting a divorce, I’m talking about getting your head straight and saving your kids.

If you are getting beat on, spit on, verbally abused, watching your kids live in fear, drugs are being used in the home ..the list goes on and on, then this is a unhealthy environment for your kids to grow up in.

I lived in shelters many of times growing up. We saw some stuff . My dad was on heroin and put us through alot. He is a great man now and all is forgiven, but when he was younger he had some real issues to deal with.

I went through similar things as an adult too.
So at one point I said, “Enough”
I needed to help my kids, I needed to think of them .

If your man wants to do his thing ,put that man in God’s hands ,trust God and raise your kids to know Jesus. Its the most important job in the world to raise your babies.

When your the only parent paying attention to the needs of your kids, you have got to do whats best for them. Your sons and daughters seeing you get kicked around, punched out and called a female dog isn’t right AT ALL.
If that’s all you you’ve ever known, then stop and think.DO I want my kids to end up like him?

Pray about this . There is help for you.

Some suggestions for resources

Local churches,Women’s shelters, Police Stations
Love you

Disneyland Thanksgiving Vacation

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What Disneyland means to us:

My children had been begging me for a trip to The Happiest Place on Earth, and I wanted to find a way to get them there. When my husband passed away in 2011, and our church sent our family on a trip to Disneyland, it was really an escape from all of the stresses we were going through. Disneyland is truly magical, and my family connected while enjoying ourselves together; we finally got to be carefree. After my daughter Lani’s battle with cancer, and the realization that my oldest children were becoming adults before my very eyes, I wanted badly to give my children another happy memory.

 

Planning Ahead:

Three months ahead of time, I searched the internet for the best deals for a hotel, while still wanting somewhere that was directly across the street, big enough to accommodate to my family, and included a free breakfast for my team. I ended up going with Best Western Park Place Inn and Mini-Suites on South Harbor Blvd, a Good Neighbor Hotel. I originally booked with them on a third-party website, but when I FullSizeRender (1)called the hotel to see if they could offer a lower rate, they gave me an even better deal! Great customer service.

A tip that I recommend for families on a budget is signing up for an email list for nearby restaurants so that you can get sent coupons, which sometimes include free things especially when it’s near your birthday! Earl of Sandwich at Downtown Disney gave us coupons for free sandwiches, which were very tasty.

When you are a single parent, things like a vacation always have to come with somewhat of a budget in mind. I wanted to have enough time to save up, but not so much time that it would be unbearable to wait. Lani had always wanted to see the park during the Christmas holiday season, but we wanted to be home for Christmas itself, so we planned to go three months ahead of time, during my kids’ Thanksgiving break. This also fell on my son Louis’ 17th birthday, and my daughter Lani’s 19th birthday, which would be perfect.


 

I also wanted to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner with the kids at the park, somewhere that we could just sit around the table, take our time, and unwind. I had wanted to see how the Grand Californian Hotel and Spa looked for the holidays, so we had in mind that we wanted to eat at a restaurant there. While the Napa Rose was out of our price range, I was able to reserve a buffet dinner for a bargain at Storyteller’s Café.

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I was determined not to spend money unnecessarily for a month prior to our vacation. I wanted to have plenty of money to spend while at the park. We saved up little Disney trinkets here and there, so the younger kids would have things to play with in the car. Most of these toys and things came from Target and Wal-Mart, where I got them for a steal.

The Big Trip:

We left the Bay Area at around 6 am and hit the road. My three-year-old Logan had a good time playing with his Mickey Mouse toys and coloring books, while the older kids enjoyed watching movies like The Nightmare Before Christmas and Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas on my phone. This really got them hyped up and excited for our destination.

When we arrived at the Best Western, we were surprised at how unbelievably close it was to the park entrance! Right when you exit the hotel, there’s the crosswalk that leads straight to the park. Perfect to tote my big family around. We ended up walking back a couple of times mid-day to pick up jackets, or snacks, and it was quick and easy to go back to give Logan a nap if I needed to. I felt safe walking to and from the hotel, and let my kids do so as well. This gave me peace of mind. The receptionist was knowledgeabunnamed (2)le and assisted us in finding our way around. The room was spacious and clean. The beds were comfortable, and my kids loved it. Since the room came with a microwave and mini fridge, I went to the Target around the corner from the hotel, and loaded up on snacks, sandwich supplies, and drinks. We ate snacks at the end of the day from our room, and sometimes packed sandwiches in a small lunch cooler to take in the park.

Thanksgiving Dinner:

Thanksgiving Day, the park was filled with people, but we didn’t mind. The kids and I went through Downtown Disney to arrive at the Grand Californian Hotel and Spa. The hotel was exquisitely decorated for Christmas, it was warm and cozy inside. The fireplace was roaring, and the main Christmas tree inside was magnificent. While waiting for our table at Storyteller’s Cafe in the large lobby, my family and I sat and admired the tree while listening to a live pianist play Christmas and Disney songs.

When we went inside Storyteller’s Café, it was as inviting as the rest of the hotel. The Thanksgiving Buffet was AMAZING. It included all the fixings from prime rib, turkey and salmon, to stuffing and fresh green beans, and a spread of elegant, delicious desserts. They really outdid themselves. The chefs and servers were very kind, and looked happy to be there. It was by far the best meal, service, setting and price I have ever seen. It would have cost me the same, if not more, to do this kind of meal at home. But instead of stressing over cookunnameding the Thanksgiving meal (and doing the dishes afterwards!), it was all done for me, and I could focus on being with my family. It was a Thanksgiving I will never forget, that’s for sure.

At the Park:

OH MY GOSH, Disneyland during the holidays has to be one of the most amazing things I have ever seen before in my life. Main Street USA at nighttime was one of the highlights of the trip. My kids and I were in AWE while walking, with views of the Christmas tree, the falling snow, Sleeping Beauty’s Castle, and the twinkling lights surrounding us. My daughter and I felt like crying, it was all so beautiful. I took mental pictures of my children’s lit-up faces as they took everything in – THIS is why we came to Disneyland.

I’m not much of a fan of rides, but my kids LOVED them. I’d just wait for the kids while they enjoyed it, taking in the ambiance, while sipping on a Peppermint Mocha from the Starbucks at either Disneyland Park or California Adventure Park. I enjoyed seeing the little hidden Mickey’s and Christmas details while walking around, from the plants to the buildings, to the characters and even the cheerful Christmas music.

Altogether, my kids’ favorite rides were The Haunted Mansion, because it’s theme was changed to The Nightmare Before Christmas forunnamed (1) the holidays, and Radiator Springs Racers. They would not stop talking about both rides. They also LOVED The Pirates of the Caribbean, Splash Mountain, Space Mountain, Grizzly River Run, and California Screamin’. My three-year-old’s favorite rides were Astro Blasters and Dumbo. I know these were his favorites because he threw a tantrum when I tried to get him off of them. The older kids liked walking around on their own, and often used Disneyland Railroad to get through the different lands.

As a family, we enjoyed the nightly holiday-themed fireworks show, which we viewed from Main Street USA. We ended one of our nights together watching fireworks and eating yummy corn dogs. Logan and I liked watching Fantasmic! while the older four kids were in The Haunted Mansion. A family favorite was also watching World of Color together at California Adventure Park, as it was also holiday-themed, and the host of the show was none other than Olaf the Snowman! My kids got a kick out of that. They also delighted in walking through Cars Land in California Adventure, especially during nighttime. It was like stepping into the movie, plus it was also festive. Logan talked to Lightning McQueen while we waited for the other kids when they were on Radiator Springs Racers. Another favorite was going to ¡Viva Navidad! at CA Adventure. They really showed Latin American culture in a beautiful way, and it made me proud to be Latina. There were cultural festivities, including a parade of music and dancing, performances, food, and more. Even Mickey, Minnie, and the gang looked the part and were celebrating!FullSizeRender

FOOOOOOD. There was so much good food there. We were definitely not calorie-counting, and we excused ourselves since we were at Disneyland. We all loved the corn dogs from Little Red Wagon in DL, they were the best corn dogs we’d ever had. A couple of my kids preferred the hot link corn dogs at Corn Dog Castle in CA Adventure, they liked the kick of heat in those. My children went crazy over Dole Whip from Tiki Juice Bar at Adventureland in DL, and I really do think it was refreshing. The cream cheese-filled pretzels and churros from the carts were also big hits. And as I already mentioned, Storyteller’s Café was just amazing.

This was the trip of a lifetime. I’m so glad I got to spend the holiday with my children at such a magical place. Disneyland brought my family together.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Story as a Troubled Teen & The Love That Saved Me

 

 

I’ll start by talking about my own experience as a youth. Growing up drugs were in my environment where I lived. I watched my dad’s life spiral out of control with a Heroin addiction for many years. I would cry for my daddy who I loved every time he was locked up in prison again. I had high hopes clinging on to every promise he made to me. Promises like “This is the last time”, and “I’m Going to change” etc. Every time he would get out of prison everything was great! All was well until the problems of life were in his face. Things like our grades, my tight jeans bothered him, our rooms needed to be cleaned. He would find an excuse to be mad & so that was “why” he had to go. He would go back to his old ways . We wouldn’t see him again for long periods of time. My Mom would be depressed all over again & sleep so much due to the whirlwind of confusion in our lives.

We were all so dysfunctional. I think I tried pot at around age 11. Someone was babysitting me at age 12, their friend who was there gave me a drug in a glass pipe to smoke. You would think I would have had common sense not to do this. But somehow I thought that drugs were normal. Later in my teens I was into Meth and Cocaine.

I wanted to be thinner, so I asked someone who was skinnier then me how she did it. How did she stay so thin? She told me she would eat and then make herself throw up. She told me also take laxatives. We also shared drugs mostly meth. I was a real mess.

I started to become bulimic. I would eat and purge. Every time I took a shower, my Mom would listen by the door. Because I would purge in the shower & she knew it. The enamel off my front tooth started coming off probably from the acid in my stomach due to purging. She asked me to stop doing this to myself. But I was so self-destructive. I also went through a time of practically starving myself.

I had a lot of suicidal thoughts and heard voices telling me to kill myself .I was so confused and no one could help me.

During this time in my life I remember people saying terrible things about me to my parents. Even though most of it was true. Their gossiping about me hurt so badly and it broke my parent’s heart to hear these things. Never once did these people try to reach out to me or share with me their Christian faith. I didn’t trust them & I felt worthless. But God is the one who put a stop to all of this confusion. He snatched me from the road of destruction. He redirected my life & made me new. He gave me such a peace.

I now minister to at risk youth, I am such a blessed woman. I have seen what Love can do. I am a life that was changed because he loved me. As flawed and imperfect as I was, he still valued my life & loved me. I will never forget all he did for me.

That’s how the Lord looks at youth, valuable, priceless and loved. Telling someone I love you is good, but go further. Buy a youth a meal, this means a lot to them. I find sharing a meal with people shows you care. Take time to hear what they have to say. Be a good listener and pray for their lives often. Kids know a phony, they are street smart and can tell when someone is real. Speak life into their situation that seems hopeless to them. They need mentoring, encouragement to get an education & they need the Lord in their lives. There is nothing God cannot do. My life is changed because someone loved me. That someone was Jesus. He saved me from taking my own life and gave me a new one. I am not the same. Love gives people motivation to go on. Love gives people hope that everything will be OK. People need to know there is someone who will never reject them, so we point them to God!

By the way I have more good news, my dad has been clean for many years now, Praise God!

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

Romans 5:8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Proverbs 8:17 I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently find me.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Luke 7:47 “I tell you, her sins–and they are many–have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.”